Tuesday, July 31, 2007

Flop With Chicks? Try Love Potion Number Nine, Try Amortentia...

Walter Groesel, stock.Xchng

... Or Try Subliminal Power!

The Love Potion Song
There's this song written by Jerry Leiber and Mike Stoller in 1959, and sung by the Clovers. The song describes a gypsy named Madam Ruth, who runs her shop selling potions at Thirty-Fourth and Vine. The singer walks up to her with the complaint that he is a "flop with chicks". The lady studies his hand, and prescribes him "Love Potion Number Nine". And the liquid that he drinks... turns him into a kisser of everything that comes in his way! Until a cop breaks his reverie.

Then there is Professor Horace Slughorn, Potions Master and teacher at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. The strongest love potion in the world, according to the good professor, is Amortentia. This potion has "a distinctive mother-of-pearl sheen", and its steam rises "in characteristic spirals". The potion has a unique ability to smell differently to everybody, according to what in their inherent nature attracts them.

image by Alexandre Jaeger Vendruscolo, stock.Xchng

Sigh. If only one could lay one's hands on the number nine potion, or this Amortentia thing!

Finding Love: Reality Angle
That the world is desperately in need of the Love Potion Number Nine or Harry Potter's Amortentia is evident from the failures and frustrations and disappointments that seekers of love face. You meet some guy or gal, there is an initial spark, you think you found the one you were looking for, and rush in to tie the knot. But alas! The knot proves too weak for quite a few.

image by Steve Woods, stock.Xchng

Why does it happen? Why is it that some individuals enjoy relationships that last a lifetime, while others simply lurch from one relationship to another?

BBC - Taiwanese Couple Have World's Longest Marriage

This lurching is reflected in the divorce statistics dished out regularly by government agencies. According to Jennifer Baker, Director of Marriage and Family Therapy Program, Forest Institute of Professional Psychology, "50% percent of first marriages, 67% of second and 74% of third marriages end in divorce."

Dr. Jennifer Baker

The boy or the girl who said "I Do" in those 50% cases, or the grown-ups who said the same thing in 67% and later in 74% cases: what did they see in their partner? Obviously, there was something wrong about the choice they made. Disillusionment sets in once the short-term magic of holding hands and whispering sweet-nothings wears off, the honeymoon is over, and reality of marriage kicks in. Aaaah, where is the love potion no. 9, where is the bottle of Amortentia to keep those love bubbles going?

image by Isabel Betancur, stock.Xchng

The problem is with that initial spark, I think. It is the skip of the heartbeat upon seeing someone, which gives you a high, and lulls you into thinking that you have found your love at long last. Why did you get the wrong spark, the wrong signal, in the first place, when it was predestined to doom-dom? Why didn't your sixth sense, your instinct, your hunch, give you the right information in the first place?

image by Katie Crabb, stock.Xchng

In my opinion, this happens because of some fault in the way our personality is constructed. This fault could manifest itself in the form of a false self-image that we build for ourselves that is totally different from what we at our core, really are. We then go around hunting for a partner who is compatible with that false self-image, and not with our true self.

image by ehsan namavar, stock.Xchng

It works both ways: the universe pushes towards us an individual who has the same fault in their personality that is compatible with our fault. As if automatically, the individual who matches our personality, fault et al, walks into our life. The Law of Attraction plays out. If the "I Do" happens, then so does the divorce. Because, like all falsities, our core personality rebels at any union that does not gel with itself. And we keep hip-hopping from one relationship to another... desperately seeking that happy union which appears ever-elusive...

Ever tried mixing kerosene with water? See how the two liquids separate themselves in the beaker after a while, no matter how rigorously you may have stirred the mixture? The principle is the same - whether it is immiscible liquids or immiscible relationships.

image by Laura Nubuck, stock.Xchng

A Self-Dev Solution
So is there a way to rectify the fault in our personality? Can we straighten out the kinks so that the next time we step out, we are sure and certain that we will meet only the person who is just right for us? And not somebody who will turn out to be yet another disappointment?

image by Kevin Rohr, stock.Xchng

One very good technique is to hone up that sixth sense. That very same instinct, that very same hunch, which comes into play when you are sizing up the person before you. And this is possible through a lot of introspection, carried out through a lot of meditation. Now I don't suggest that you shave your head and go to the monasteries. You can do this introspection, and some light meditation even while you are travelling in your daily tube or bus or whatever.

image by Kay Pat, stock.Xchng

If you happen to be using the computer for good number of hours everyday, here is one very good solution to come to terms with your core: The Subliminal Power software. Here is the link: http://www.short10.com/?c=bvis-subliminal. This software costs USD 39.95. It installs on your computer, and you can configure it to your requirements. There are several built-in scripts that come with the product. While you can select "Men's Stuff - Become a Total Woman Magnet" or "Women's Stuff - Become a Total Man Magnet" (don't go by the commercial lingo used here, the product is really serious), you can of course devise your own scripts.

Symbol of Subliminal Power

Try it. Understand your core. Understand yourself. And then seek for the right person in your life. The universe has designed one especially and exclusively for you out there, waiting just for you.

image by Isabel Betancur, stock.Xchng

[For yet another take on the subject of conjugal relationships, surf to - "What If - The Fisherman Does Not Discover The Ring". And here is another angle on why people fail to win into their life the one they have set their heart on - "http://success-nirvana.blogspot.com/2008/02/this-valentines-day.html".]

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Tuesday, July 24, 2007

The Confrontation Between Bademus And Nersan

Gold inlaid with turquoise, Iran, Parthian period (Met Museum)

This Confrontation Goes On In Us In Our Life Everyday...

The Background
This is a story of three characters. Upon introspection, I find two of them to be fighting amongst themselves for supremacy even now; and they are within us. The third character is the circumstance that provokes and sparks the fight.

Shapur II, the only person in entire history to have been crowned king in utero. While he was still curled up blissfully in his mother's womb, the magnates placed the crown on his mother's belly. While he was washed and breastfed and clothed by maids and nannies, the government was run in his name. But when he came of age, boy! Did he make a name for himself!

Met Museum

It was under his reign that Persia consolidated itself and expanded its reach, and shrugged off the influence of Rome's Constantine's particular brand of religion.

Then we have Nersan, a satrap from Aria in Persia. Nersan followed the religion advocated by Constantine. A happy-go-lucky fellow, he any day preferred lolling around in the silky satins of his plush palace over the harsh discipline of abstention and frugal living.

two servants bearing food and drink, Achaemenid period

Finally, we have Bademus. The Saint from Bethlapeta, another village in Persia. The man who founded an abbey, and followed the same religion as Constantine. The man with strong self-discipline and iron willpower. An icon to look up to.

St Bademus

Faith Conversion - The Circumstance
One of the goals that Shapur II had set before him to accomplish in his lifetime was to eliminate Constantine's religion from his empire, and instead bring in and propagate his own brand of religion. Nersan and Bademus refused to change their faith. So Nersan and Bademus were enemies in Shapur II's eyes. He ordered both of them to be imprisoned, to be given a daily dose of tortures with the hope that they would change their mind.

Our friend, Nersan, weakling that he was - caved in soon. Not for him the daily flogging and the foot-roasting and the flesh grilling. Oh, he was not used to such discomforts and inconveniences at all! So he caved in, and supplanting himself at Shapur II's feet, agreed to apostatize.

CalResco Image

Not so, Bademus. He refused to be broken. For four long months, the henchmen of Shapur II's crack team worked on the Saint from Bethlapeta, sweated and slogged, busy applying their tools of the torture trade on him. But not a cry of repentance left Bademus' lips. A time came when the team had to give up, and they reported to the King that this was a nut that could not be cracked.

Shapur II's pride was at stake. If you can't beat them, kill them!... was his motto. So he decided to execute Bademus. And he plotted a devious plan for execution. Instead of ordering his own men to do the sordid job, he decided to give the task to Nersan, as a test to prove the latter's disdain for people who were not part of his new faith.

Nersan had been given a chamber in the royal palace instead of the usual dungeons allotted for the non-faithful. Bademus was sent to Nersan's chamber, and a sword was handed to Nersan to carry out the execution.

Sword, mid-1st century B.C.; Late Iron Age; Iron blade, copper alloy hilt and scabbard

The Execution - Who Finally Won?
So the scene was set. Nersan, the weakling, a lifetime spent in lolling in satin cushions and comfy beds, and generally enjoying the goodies of life, stood face to face with Bademus - the man with enormous spiritual strength.

Telisphere image

Bademus, as was his wont, was undeterred when his murderer came lurching towards him. He knew of course that his end was near. He had the option of falling on his knees, and cry for clemency. He had the option to fight Nersan, with whatever physical stamina left. But he didn't raise his little finger. Arms akimbo, he stood there, waiting for the inflictions to wound his body.

Surprisingly, it was Nersan who felt the guilt and the remorse and the shame at the act he was performing. But having agreed to perform, he couldn't go back, could he. So he lurched to the left and to the right, his shaking hand tearing the sword into the flesh of the body of Bademus. Finally, the blade hit the saint's neck. It took four hits to finally shear off the head.

It is said that Nersan himself committed harakiri later.

Jelena's pic

The Confrontation In Us
Bademus and Nersan are two opposite poles. Nersan is the quintessential human being - vacillating between moral high stands and tempting depths. Bademus is an icon that humans look forward to, but seldom achieve.

We all have strains of Nersan in us. We enjoy our little indulgences. And at the same time, we try to make a song-and-dance about our set of values - they are our own version of Bademus. Circumstances take on the form of Shapur II to pose a threat to our material comfort and convenience. So it is comfort versus values. And we - like Nersan - are too willing to chuck our values out the window. To hell with them values! And then we whack ourselves with guilt and remorse and shame. And try to justify our existence by killing the ghost of our values that, Bademus-like, stands before us.

Almost all the time, it is the Nersan in us who ends up killing the Bademus in us.

And after wishing our Bademus away from our eyes, we realize that our existence no longer has any meaning. And we commit spiritual hara-kiri. So though we continue to live, it is an empty life.

Is Bademus, perfection that is impossible to achieve?

Bust of Shapur II
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Monday, July 16, 2007

Meditate Today! At 11 Minutes Past Eleven GMT Time ...

Fire The Grid

Today, on 17th July 2007, at exactly 11 minutes past eleven GMT time, join us all to connect to the large grid of human beings on this planet earth, and meditate for world peace. If you can sit still and simply let the thought of world peace seep into your mind for an hour - just one hour -, it could just might make all the difference to peace and happiness in this world.

For more details, log onto this site - http://www.firethegrid.com/. It might take you a while to get in, for the millions of hits have been crashing its servers all the time.

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Wednesday, July 11, 2007

Binge Eating - One Good Way To Get Rid Of This Habit ...

Image by Julia Freeman-Woolpert, stock.Xchng

Use Motivator Software!

This is a simple experiment I tried on a student who had gained five kilos in as many months. The experiment brought this girl back to her normal cloth-sizes, and she has overcome her habit of binge-eating. Would you like to try it out?

Andras Deak, stock.Xchng

Of course, I do not have the wherewithal or resources to replicate this as a double-blind experiment on batches of subjects. So I cannot make any "scientific" statement. At the same time, the solution is non-invasive and has absolutely no side-effects. There is no patent to it either, and there is absolutely no cost associated. You can try it out in the privacy of your desk and desktop - it is that simple.

Cindy Kalamajka, stock.Xchng

Coming back to this student. Let's call her Angela. She and her mother began realizing that she was hitting the fridge more often than usual. This coincided with the announcement of Angela's university of the dates of the exam she was due to appear in. It was obviously the stress of preparing for the exam and the high hopes she had set for herself that were gnawing her innards, which her body compensated by craving food.

Stephen Coburn, stock.xchng

When Angela came to me for counseling, she had already gained four kilos. It took a session or two to realize what was going on. Since she spent a major part of her day before her desktop poring over her study notes, I decided to put her concentration - as well as her motivation - to her own advantage.

Motivator Image

I got her to download the free software called "Motivator". I emailed to her a script containing self-affirmation sentences, all focused on her particular situation. Her main cause for gaining weight was not craving-for-food. It was her worry at doing well in the exams, and meeting her own expectations. This was what I focused upon.

The software would auto-load at the time of boot-up, and the messages would start popping up, ever so gently, once every two minutes. There are some very good settings in the software that make it possible.

Motivator Settings

There was the initial expected period of "no-results". "Nope, it is not working. I still crave food, and I still go to the kitchen for food. The messages look sooo silly when I return after my fill and sit again before the computer!" I asked her to be patient. Good habits, like bad habits, take time and practice to form.

sanja gjenero, stock.Xchng

And now she is quite okay. The exam is due tomorrow. Not only has her craving stopped, she has reduced in weight. Plus, she is brimming with confidence about her success in her exams.

Here is the product. You can download it for free: http://www.short10.com/?c=sdblog_motivator.

Here is an article that dwells on the habit of binge-eating: The Stomach Is An Inflatable Sac, Sure.

Motivator Image
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Wednesday, July 04, 2007

How Britney Spears Can Accelerate Her Come-Back...

Britney Spears

... With A Dose Of Guided Self-Hypnosis & Meditation

Getting success early on in life can be fun. Only, as Britt discovered, if it is accompanied by proper mentoring by level-headed managers / family members.

Britney Spears

Britney Spears. The "...Baby One More Time" teenage pop diva, who captured the heart of millions of fans in 1998 was just seventeen when celebrity status hit her.

Success after success followed - giving her no time to grow up like any normal girl. Her managers and family members tried to project her as "that virgin" who is taking the first tentative steps to deflowerment. Not a Girl, But Yet Not a Woman.

Britney Spears

What compelled her to marry Jason Allen Alexander? And then get it annulled in less than three days? Judge Lisa Brown summed it up succinctly: Britney "lacked understanding of her actions to the extent that she was incapable of agreeing to marriage because before entering into the marriage" Britney and Jason "did not know each other's likes and dislikes, each others' desires to have or not have children, and each other's desires as to State of residency."

Jason Alexander & Britney Spears

Where could Britney have found the maturity for, to understand fully her own actions? They never gave her time to grow up at all.

Marriage to Kevin Federline was destined to disaster from the start. An already-married man, Kevin was rumored to be bedding with other girls in his life even while pledging undying love to our Brit. It was infidelity that apparently broke the family.

Something snapped, I think, around the time of the breakup. Kevin must have been really insensitive to her feelings about him and about the relationship. It is interesting, and characteristic of her state of mind, that she found a soul-mate in the likes of Paris Hilton, who gave Brit her shoulder to cry on. The walking around town without any underwear on, the wild partying... are all traits of a mind trying desperately to find happiness in a life that simply didn't seem to be working out... The degeneration started ... and this girl from a small town in Mississippi inevitably landed up in a drug rehab center in Antigua. Followed by the defiling session in a salon.

Britney Spears

The latest in the Britney Spears saga, the paparazzi tell us, is that the girl has problems with her mom, and she (rightly?) blames the old lady for all the problems in her life, besides the manager who looked after her commercial interests. News released just two hours ago today (4th July) says that ex Kevin will now seek custody orders to keep Britney away from the kids, lest she should once again walk down the self-destruction path.

Image by Richard Sweet, stock.Xchng

The past two months - May and June - have seen her struggling to find a semblance of sanity back in her life. They call it her "Comeback plan". She's got back to doing what she knows best: churn out yet another pop album.

How can she accelerate her comeback? I can suggest two good remedies that I know of:

The first is Meditation. There is tons of information available on the internet for how one can go about meditating. Meditation also presupposes a change in lifestyle, something veterans too have advocated to her. The best, best remedy for a troubled mind to find its center is Meditation. Half-an-hour to one-hour of meditation everyday can do wonders to her state of mind.

TIME Front Cover

The second is guided self-hypnosis. These are mp3 audio scripts that one listens to from CDs, and are based on the simple but very powerful concept of positive auto-suggestion. Here is one CD that can help her rediscover herself, pick up the pieces of her life, find out what she should do next, and move on:


Hypnosis Box

And I guess this applies not only to Britney, but to Lindsay Lohan and Paris Hilton as well.

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